Friday, January 16, 2009

Caution...this is a looong story, but good.

Didya ever wanna just reach thru the phone and........gggrrrrr
I am more than ashamed of myself (as is the rest of my family) (and probably my neighbors if you get down right honest). I threw one of the biggest fits I have thrown in quite sometime. I mean to tell you I was HOT, mad as a wet hen, fit to be tied and all those other phrases that go along with actin a fool. And guess what it was over....give up? The stupid CELL-PHONE bill. I think you may understand better if you knew the heart ache we have suffered since November and the out-right lies we have been told. At any rate, the bill we got was somewhere in the neighborhood of $700.00!! Yes, that's American dollars. Now, we don't owe that much of course. I mean, I ain't got no friends in Budhapest for pete's sake. It was a mix up. But these "mix-ups" are happening EVERY MONTH!!!!! Between Jason & myself, we have talked to 8 people in the last 3 months. Can someone stop the insanity please??? I said all that to say this. The supervisor hung up on me! That's right girls, hung up on me. And you know what I was thinkin' right? "Hang up on me, oh noooo she didn't, she don't know who she's dealin with, I"ll....." and that's when it hit me, wonder what I said to her to make her have a snoot full and hang up on yours truly? Could it have been my bubbly personality? Maybe it was the way my voice just got a little louder with each sentence? Oh, I know, it had to be the way I just lit into her and reemed her out like she was the one who personally figured my bill, put it in the mail, and laughed all the way back to her desk? Yep, I bet that was it. I find it very amusing how we (by we I mean Christians) can sometimes go all kinda crazy on people in the comfort of our homes on the phone, and think we will not be noticed. And you know most of us don't fail to mention to the "victim" the fact that we are a Christian. I reckon sometimes I think God can't see through my roof. Laughin yet? (maybe it's just me) The second worst part of the whole cell phone fiasco is that Jason & I had our own yelling match. Poor guy, evrytime I have to talk on the phone with anyone for longer than 15 minutes, I turn into "Missi-she-devil" and shoot invisible lasers out of my eyes, snap my fingers at him like he's a poodle and find myself saying "sshh" a lot. I despise the phone. That's why God invented texting...hahah

Kaitlyn and I cleaned an office building today. We worked so hard. My housse is still dirty, but hey, nobody's paying me to clean it. hahaha
She did such a good job. I think she's getting to dread going anywhere alone with me cuz that's the time I use to "talk". I think she's just about over it. Yet, somehow I never tire of the subject of teen sex and how you should never never never never consider it. Did I make my point? No, really, I use scripture and try to make sure she has her own opinion.(mine)
I have to say that I am so very blessed. My family is awesome.
It didn't always used to be that way. I was raised in Soddy-Daisy, Tn. WOO HOO. Between my mom, granny, and aunts, I had plenty of love. The one thing I didn't have was Christ or church. My aunt Kathy was a believer. She was a member of the Church of Christ. I remember she would take me with my little cousin April and it would scare the mess out of me! When I got older, my mom and step dad bought a house and I had wonderful Christian neighbors who took me to vbs everytime momma would let me go. I will never forget that sweet, big ole preacher calling all of us who "didn't want to go to hell and burn in a lake of fire" to GET to that altar right that minute and say this prayer that would set us free. So I mad a Bee-line to the front of that Baptist church and knelt, all the while, looking around to see how many of my friends were there and looking with one eye open while we ALL repeated after him. When it was over, I would guess there were probably 40 or more kids down at that altar who believed they were saved. Now, I'm not tryin to say that some of them weren't. I just know I wasn't. I went on to live my life, eventually moved to live with my dad and step mom and finsh high school at Ider. Those two years were the roughest of my life. I don't mean rough because of school or my parents, I mean rough because I lived like HELL. The day I met my "best friend" at band camp, I brought a 24oz. cup of vodka and orange juice. You get what I mean by rough yet? We bacame fast friends, my dinking buddy and me, along with several others just like us. I spent the next 2 years for the most part in a drunken stupor. The worst part of all of that is I was the designated drunk driver. Hey, I was the best drunk driver I knew! I drove all my friends around, ALL THE TIME. Somehow I graduated high school and was given a choice by my parents: go to college or go to work. Work? Ha. So I decided to try college. Guess what..? I blew that too. Even though I was pretty smart, I was too dumb to show up for class. I was too busy partying and chasing afer the guy who is now my husband. (go figure) Oh but it gets better, we did something real smart. We decided to move in together. Cuz you know you have to see if you can live with somebody before you marry them, right? NOT!! All was well in our rat-infested, nearly condemned love shack and I mean shack. So we decided to get married. With NO money saved, no vehicle, no home, pretty much nothing but dreams and the love in our hearts. AAWWW. Barf. My parents begged us to go on a cruise to get married and take the money we would have spent and gotten as presents and use it for a house but nooo, I had to have that wedding. It was pretty and all but looking back now I know it wasn't sanctified because we weren't saved. I'm getting to a point I promise. (Aren't you enjoying the story though) We did in fact find a house. A real....fixer-upper for lack of a better term. Let's put it this way, when we bought it, there was a family of raccoons living in it and a couple of carcases in the living room. Thanks to our families, we were able to fix it up enough to live in it. In the process, I found out I was pregnant. The response I got from my step mom was "oh no". I, however, couldn't have been happier. (dumb,dumb,dumb) At the time we were staying in a pop-up camper on the property. We had lights but no water or phone or heat. We used a 5 gallon bucket for a lavatory (that's bathroom for us rednecks)and cooked on a coleman stove. Never happier though..really. Well, we had our daughter and tried to live a "good life" according to OUR standards. I quit my partying ways but my husband wasn't ready to turn lose just yet. About 2 years later we were expecting again. What do you know, I got the same response? This time we had a son. Man did I love that boy. Don't get me wrong, my daughter was perfect in every way and the love for her was unmatched. But for those mom's who have a understand what I mean. He was polar opposite of his sissy. Attached to my hip.
A couple years into our "blissful" existance, I took the kids and left Jason. I just got our stuff together and went back to Soddy. It wasn't like it was spur of the moment but it sure shocked Jason. We stayed gone for about a year. The house was sold, everything he (we) had worked so hard for...gone just like that. I don't think I even gave it a second thought. I would bring Jason his kids on his weekends and he looked so awful at first but I didn't care, hey now, this was my time to catch up on what I had missed. I needed to party. After all, I was young, cute, and single (in my book). So party I did. A whole lot. So much so that I "celebrated" a few holes in my stomch. That's a story for another time. Excited?? I did things I would never tell anyone. God only knows. When I had moved my innocent, sweet babies 4 times, I finally decided it was enough. I came home with them. Only this time home was a little trailer that was a lot of years old with only 2 bedrooms. But we made it work. My marriage really wanted to be good. (does that make sense?) Jason didn't want to give up drinking and I chose not to honor my vows. We lived like that for awhile. Never in front of the kids, you know that makes it ok. As long as the kids don't SEE.
Well, my kids had some neighbors that invited them to vbs one week and they went and had the best time. The paastor's wife even came on Sunday's and Wednesday's and picked them up. Of course we were invited but you know you can't go to church til you get yourself all "straightened" up. That's what I believed. And, besides, I had said that whole prayer when I was little remeber? I was saved, I didn't need them folks making me all uncomfortable and having to get up, put on a dress, who needs that hassle? What happened next I never would have expected in a zillion years. I was at my sink washing dishes, Katie's at school, Jay's napping, and out of nowhere I started to tremble. And when I say tremble, I mean inside and out, it was unlike anything I've felt before or since. I dropped the glass I was washing and felt the urge, no the NEED to go to the foot of my bed and get on my knees. So I did. I don't remember a lot after that, just uncontrollable wailing & sobs and saying over and over "I'm sorry" and "Thank you" there was much much more. I know this because when I was finally able to look up and I got to my feet, Katie was coming in the house. Almost an hour and 1/2 had passed. That, my friends, was the day that the Holy Spirit reigned down on me and called me to His service to be SAVED, a child of the King, redeemed of everything I had done in my past. I don't mind telling you that it frightened me a little bit and it did Katie too. She thought I was hurt cuz I was cryin so hard. That afternoon, I called the lady across the road to find out what time church started the next morning and I was faithful to that little church for almost 2 years. I took the kids any time the doors were opened. I carried them to any revival I knew of. I took part in any service I could. Not bragging on me, but just to explain the zeal the Holy Spirit had instilled in me. It was a good time.,except we were missing Jason. His excuse was more ligit than mine though. See..he was raised in church so he already knew all that "God stuff". We begged and begged. I always told him about the sermons and Sunday school lessons and he listened so intently. Heck, he even hid his beer can when the preacher would come visit. After a while, he made sure he was gone on days he knew they were coming. When the kids and I moved our membership to another church, we were growing even more spiritually,except Jason.
On March 30,2003 I let the kids go to church with a friend while I slept (by then I was workin nights). After church,Kaitlyn and Jay came in like usual but this time Miss Trina followed. Katie sat on the couch while I was half in a daze and proceeded to tell me with the biggest smile I have ever seen on her sweet face that she was SAVED. My initial reaction was "I missed it". I thought in my head of course. Outwardly I grabbed her sweet little self and squeezed and cried and probably almost burst her eardrum. See, I knew what she was feeling, so that made me so happy for her. Then my next thought was about Jason. And no sooner could I finish my thought & she asked me, "Can Daddy come to my baptism?" My heart was so heavy. I knew how deeply he loved that little girl, but I also knew how he felt about church. I felt like God had been dealing with him for a while now so of course I had it all played out in my mind, he would go see her be baptized and BAM..he'd be saved!! How bout that for MY will be done?
Later that evening, after he had successfully avoided visitation, he came home. Katie wasted no time. She jumped on his lap and told him all about being saved. She told him how it was even before the preacher preached, they were just singing and she said she started crying and felt like she needed to pray so she asked Trina to go with her. Even now I cry when I picture that innocent little freckled face with tears streaming down it asking a grown up to go with her to do what must have been the scariest feeling in her little life. (she was only 9) . After she finished telling him and inviting him, he looked at me kinda wanting me to doubt that her experience was genuine. Wasn't gonna happen. So, he was left with no choice. After all, he rarely said no to the girl.
One week later, I was up at 5 am ready to get breakfast made, clothes ready and out the door with time to spare, not to mention I couldn't sleep. We got ready and got there. I couldn't tell you what any of us were wearing or if we even matched, but we made it. Keep in mind that these people have been hearing about and praying for Jason for about a year.(some even longer). So, in keeping with your average baptist manner, they all had to hug his neck and shake his hand. There were a few people to be baptized that day so to "kick things off" the pastor had the congregation gather around the whole sanctuary, hold hands and sing that song that says "Brethren pray and Holy manna will be showered all around" Can't think of the name. (i told u i'm a dork).
We had our hands joined and raised, then most of us went to the altar. (it was a very spiritual day)
I was praying and praying that the Lord be so real to us that day and bless the baptism and thanking Him for Kaitlyn's salvation, when I felt a tap on my shoulder. Ok, ladies, you know when you are deep in prayer you HEAR the Lord right, well I thought I felt Him tappin on my shoulder, ok? I didn't even raise my head, then I heard a woman's voice (whew) say the sweetest words I've ever heard. "You can get up, darlin, your prayers have been answered." (i'm boo-hooing now as i remember this) I looked up and to my left was the most precious thing I've ever seen. My husband wasn't on his knees, honey, he was on his FACE sobbing with his whole body surrendering to the Christ. Woo! I couldn't even pray with him. I just sat there on my knees with my hands lifted crying over and over to God "Thank You" When I did look again, our baby girl was there petting his back and wiping his tears. That moment was so unexplainable. My family was completed on that day.
Did I mention that while we were singing, Jason was sitting alone on the pew? One of our friends ,when telling the story, mentions that fact. He puts it better than I can. He said Jason could not have been in a better place. We made that circle around him.
When he was able, he did say a few words. I don't remember much cuz well you know, the emotions. I do know, as shy as he always had been, he stood in front of over 120 people including his momma and told us how he loved the Lord. He thanked everyone for the prayers. I don't remember much else.
I do know that I got a new husband that day. And I do know that the devil was on his job a whole whole lot after that. And he still is everyday. But satan can't stand to lose and I'm happy to say he lost a whole family. Hate that dude...NOT. I am proud to say that Jason has tried his best to walk in the faith and lead his family the same way. He is a good man ,a good husband ,and a good father, but most of all, he is a good SON (of Christ).
I sure didn't mean to write this long and I don't know if anyone will want to take the time to read it but I just felt like it needed to be told.
Next time if there is one,..maybe I will tell you how blessed he is to have me.hahaha Or the story of how we met and he fell so in love with me...can you blame him hahahah..
Until next time......Love in Him, Missi

1 comment:

  1. Oh Missi! I had huge tears welling up in my eyes to the point that I couldn't read anymore. What an awesome testimony!!!